If I were to tell you there is one skill, if improved upon, that would increase your influence with clients, employees, employers, friends and family more than any other skill, would you want to hear more? It is a skill most everyone can improve, yet only a very small percentage takes the time or realizes the power of improving this skill. Dale Carnegie said, “You can make more friends in two weeks by becoming a good listener than you can in two years trying to get other people interested in you.”
Have you ever noticed we have two ears and one mouth? As children we were taught to use them in proportion, however, most of us have forgotten this lesson as time progressed.
You don’t believe me? Then conduct a little experiment and increase your awareness. Spend today listening to the conversations that are happening around you. Most people are one-upping one another, “Oh you are going to Hawaii? We went last year.”– “Oh you have a new grandchild, let me show you the photos of mine.” We take someone’s comment and immediately want to tell them how it relates to us, stealing their thunder and making it all about us.
Another scenario is when we are waiting for the person to take a breath and then we comment on something that has been in our brain for two minutes. We have not heard anything they have said since that thought appeared. One last scenario which we see all too often at any networking event in town is the sales person or small business owner who has zero knowledge about you, your business or your needs, yet they want to sell his/her product to you. The late Zig Ziglar was one of the best in the world in his salesman days at truly listening to customers. He would find their needs and emotional wants, before offering his products. Zig was famous for saying, “You will get what you want in life if you help enough other people get what they want.” To know what they want, we must be willing to listen.
If we want satisfied customers who will give us referrals, versus customers who purchase but end up with buyer’s remorse, we will want to listen more than we want to close. It is a different marketplace today. Baby Boomers have money and want to buy, but they do not want to be sold. My mom went into a Toyota dealership knowing the car she wanted to purchase and ready to buy. The hard closing and lack of listening on the part of the sales team caused her to leave. She went across the street to the BMW dealership where she made a purchase within the hour simply based on the salesman’s listening skills.
In the book, Becoming a Person of Influence, John C. Maxwell states several benefits of listening; showing respect to the person, building relationships, increasing knowledge, generating ideas, building loyalty and yes, even closing the sale.
To read more on this story by Bridgett McAdams, pick up a copy of the June edition of Valley Business Report or visit the “Current & Past Issues” tab on this Web site.